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i don't know how hard i should be,
how hard,
how spread my legs should be

we lose happiness
we lose peace

to be what is perceived,
only to be the same
the shit
the boredom
the creation that is me
the escapism that is you

alone beyond the the grasp is a gentle peace that is

the beach

the waves


shaped happiness

feel me

and know I'm lost from that which is
forgive me
be me



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inside and out

and everywhere like a rubberball in an open field

given too much freedom to realise you are trapped by your own confines

of realism

of excepted societal norms

of the now

wanting only to be held too tight
shown freedom to just be

to dance

gripped by the loops of mind
grappling to hope, salvation

of a different view

of how once you were

and now
wish to be


without a home
not fixed as the root seems
never feeling alone


to find a goal
shaped passed a measure once thought
freedom of moment

to sleep

and to dream of

behind the veneer

i apologise for mistakes i make
my haste and sense lose time and belief
i drop from space
allowing only thoughts and touch
mechanic motions that are not present

my being is whole without my mind present

i lose the moment around me
and sometimes it saddens me

i grasp
try to breathe it in

get lost and cycle within

without me i am not myself
to my loss?

to yours?

so i hide